How to Plan a Military Funeral: A Family Guide

Rows of white marble headstones at Arlington National Cemetery with small American flags placed at each grave — header image for a guide to planning a military funeral

Planning a funeral is never easy. Planning a military funeral — with its protocols, honors, and moving parts — can feel especially overwhelming when you are already carrying the weight of grief.

This guide is here to help. It walks you through every step of planning a military funeral, from the first phone calls to the final farewell, and connects you to the detailed resources you need along the way.

Jump to a section:
The First 24 HoursChoosing a Funeral HomeRequesting Military HonorsThe Funeral ProgramUnderstanding the CeremonyPersonalizing the ServiceAfter the FuneralFull Resource Guide


The First 24 Hours

In the immediate aftermath of a veteran’s passing, there are a few things to prioritize:

  • Locate the DD-214. The key document for arranging military honors and burial benefits. If you cannot find it, don’t panic — it can be replaced. See: Military Funeral Honors: Who Qualifies and How to Arrange Them.
  • Contact a funeral home. Choose a director experienced with military funerals. They will coordinate honors, burial location, and logistics.
  • Notify the veteran’s branch of service if the death occurred on active duty. Your funeral director can help.
  • Contact the VA regarding burial allowances, headstones, and national cemetery eligibility.

You do not need to have everything figured out immediately. Take it one step at a time.


Choosing a Funeral Home

Ask any funeral home you consider: Have you coordinated military honors before? Are you familiar with the DD-214 and VA burial benefits? Can you help arrange burial at a national cemetery? A director experienced with military funerals will know how to navigate the honors system, VA paperwork, and branch-specific requirements.


Requesting Military Honors

Every honorably discharged veteran is entitled to military funeral honors at no cost — two uniformed service members, flag folding and presentation, and Taps. Your funeral director submits the request on your behalf.

👉 Military Funeral Honors: Who Qualifies and How to Arrange Them


The Funeral Program

A military funeral program typically includes the veteran’s name, branch, dates of service, and rank; a photo; the order of service; a poem or tribute; a note about the honors being rendered; and acknowledgments. All templates at Noted & Charmed are Canva-editable. Browse the Military & Patriotic collection.


Understanding the Ceremony

The standard sequence: arrival of the honor guard → processional and flag placement → opening remarks → readings and eulogy → military honors (rifle volley, Taps, flag folding, flag presentation) → closing and recessional.

👉 Understanding the Order of Service for a Military Funeral
👉 Step-by-Step: What Happens at a Military Funeral

The Military Honors in Detail


Personalizing the Service

Military protocol and personal tribute can coexist beautifully. Display medals, photographs, and uniform items; include the veteran’s favorite music; invite comrades to share stories; choose poems that reflect their branch or faith.

👉 Personalizing a Military Funeral While Honoring Tradition
👉 Original Poems for a Military Veteran’s Funeral Program
👉 Poems for a Female Veteran’s Funeral Program
👉 Quotes for a Military Veteran’s Funeral Program


After the Funeral

  • The flag — belongs to the family. Many display it in a shadow box alongside medals and photographs.
  • VA benefits — contact the VA regarding burial allowances, survivor benefits, and headstone requests.
  • Thank the honor guard — a written note is always appreciated and never expected.
  • Extra programs — order more than you think you need. Families often wish they had.
  • Grief support — the VA, American Legion, and veterans’ service organizations offer resources for families.

Full Resource Guide

Planning & Honors

The Ceremony Explained

Personalizing the Service

Poems & Tributes

The Funeral Program

© Noted & Charmed. This guide is intended for informational purposes to help families navigate military funeral planning with confidence. Sending comfort and heartfelt condolences.