Coloring Through Grief: Why Grown-Ups Color Too

It's late, the house is too quiet, and you can't read because the words won't stay put. Television is just noise. You don't want to talk, and you can't sleep. You just need to give your hands a job.

I'll tell you a secret: I buy adult coloring books, and I love them. Colormorphia and Fragile World both live on my shelf, with more pencils than any grown woman needs. On some nights a page and a box of colors has gotten me through hours that nothing else could.

So I made grief coloring pages for grown-ups, too. Below you'll find what the research honestly says about coloring, how to use a page when you're grieving, and thirteen free pages made for people who are missing someone.

What Coloring Can and Can't Do

I wanted to know whether I was just imagining the calm, so I went looking. The short answer: coloring seems to help some, it isn't magic, and nobody has studied grief coloring pages for adults directly.

It can take the edge off. In a 2005 study at Knox College, students who were made anxious and then spent 20 minutes coloring a mandala felt much less anxious afterward. Students who drew freely on a blank page didn't get the same relief. In a 2017 University of Otago trial, 104 women who colored a little every day for a week reported fewer symptoms of depression and anxiety than women who did logic puzzles.

It's a modest kind of help. Drexel University researchers had 29 adults, ages 19 to 67, spend 40 minutes coloring. Their stress dropped about 10 percent. But a session making their own art alongside an art therapist did more, lifting mood and confidence too. As the lead researcher put it, coloring has some limited benefits, but it doesn't build relationships or personal growth the way therapy can. Another study had mixed results, and coloring eased anxiety more when it came with gentle guided instructions.

It isn't therapy. The American Art Therapy Association supports coloring books for pleasure and self-care, and says plainly that they shouldn't be confused with professional art therapy.

Art and grief. A review of 27 studies of art with grieving people found it often helped them stay connected to the one they lost and make some sense of the loss. The evidence that it eases sadness itself was mixed.

So here's where I land. A coloring page won't fix grief, and it was never supposed to. It gives you a quiet half hour, something gentle to look at, and a way to sit with a memory without having to say a word.

How to Use a Page When You're Grieving

There are no rules here, but a few things helped me.

Pick the page that tugs at you. Maybe it's the man on the porch with his hat in his hands, or the pie on the counter that looks like hers. If one page feels like too much today, choose a softer one. The heavy one will wait.

Use whatever you have. Colored pencils, gel pens, a child's leftover crayons. These pages have fine detail, so sharpened pencils or fine-tip markers work well. If small spaces are hard on your eyes or hands, enlarge a page on a copier, or fill big areas and skip the tiny ones.

Color their colors. Make the flannel shirt his favorite blue. Make the quilt look like the one on her bed. Small choices like that turn a printed page into something that's yours.

Let the tears come if they come. Some nights you'll color and feel peaceful. Some nights you'll color one petal and cry. Both are fine. Put the pencil down, breathe, and come back another time.

Write on it. Add their name, a date, a saying they used. Several pages have open space, and the margins work too.

Ways to Share Them

With someone else who's grieving. Print a page for a sister, a friend from church or your dad, and color "together" over the phone or a video call, even from different states.

At a gathering. Lay a stack on the table after the service or at a memorial get-together. Some people who can't find words will happily sit and color.

In a card. A finished page tucked into an envelope says "I'm thinking of them too" better than most cards can.

As a keepsake. Keep your finished pages in a folder or frame one. On a birthday or anniversary, color a new one.

For Every Kind of Griever

Men grieve too. Some of these pages show a man planting in the garden, fishing at dawn, or sitting on the porch steps. Coloring is not only for women, and I wanted the pages to say so.

Pet loss counts. Two pages show an empty pet bed and a favorite window seat with a collar left behind. If your dog or cat was family, this grief is real.

Faith or no faith. The pages don't carry religious words, so they fit any belief. If a verse or prayer comforts you, write it in.

Caregivers and hospice families. A few pages in a bag can make long waits at a bedside or in a waiting room feel a little shorter.

When You Need More Than a Page

Coloring is a comfort, not a cure. If months have passed and the pain still crowds out everything else, or you can't take care of yourself or the things that matter to you, please talk with your doctor or a grief counselor. Our guide Grieving as an Adult explains what to watch for and where to find support.

If you'd like to go deeper with art, a credentialed art therapist can help in ways a coloring book can't. The American Art Therapy Association has an art therapist locator.

If you are thinking about ending your life, call or text 988, any time.

For Hospices, Churches and Grief Groups

You're welcome to print these pages for the people you serve, at no cost. Please keep them free and keep the Noted & Charmed name with them. They pair well with our kids' set, so the whole family can color at the same table. Find more on our For Hospice & Care Teams and Funeral Home Resources pages.

You Don't Have to Stay in the Lines

Grief makes a mess of the neat edges of life. Your page can be messy too. Use the wrong colors, leave half of it white, press so hard the pencil breaks.

What matters is that for a little while, your hands were busy and your heart got to rest. That's a small thing, and some nights it's enough.

More Help

• Grief Coloring Pages for Adults
• Free Grief Coloring Pages for Kids (110 pages)
• Grieving as an Adult: Help for Every Kind of Loss
• The First Holidays After a Loss
• All our free printables

Please note: This post and these coloring pages are general information and a comfort activity, not therapy or medical advice. If you're struggling, please talk with your doctor, a grief counselor or a licensed therapist.

If you are in crisis, call or text 988. In an emergency, call 911.

With care,
C. Lindorfer, Noted & Charmed